Ever since I was eight, I've had a relaxer. My mother use to put Just for Me in my hair, and I'd play that Just for Me tape that came in the box and shake my permed hair, and sing along like I was doing a damn commercial for the product. I remember the day that I decided that a relaxer just wasn't for me anymore, it was around the time I entered the 6th grade. I was tired of my scalp burning, but I was also tired of my momma burning my scalp with the hot comb. But I left the relaxers alone anyway, and became unhappily nappy. But I wasn't getting burned anymore. This lasted for about six months (possibly six weeks). When I returned from 6th grade camp I decided that I wanted my relaxer back. Have you ever tried using a lighter to heat a hot comb? Well, that's what we did in our camp cabin, and that is when I decided that damnit, I wanted my relaxer back. That's a struggle nobody should have to experience.

I was doing my own hair at this time. Mom wasn't waking me up and making sure it got done anymore, and I wasn't waking up in time to do it myself, so something had to give. But the final straw came when my cousins and I went swimming. I knew I wasn't supposed to get my hair wet, because, well, my hair is not the average person's hair. When all the fun and games were over that day, it was back to life back to reality. My oldest cousin washed my hair, and then she pulled the blow dryer out. Man listen, she had the blow dryer with the comb attachment, and...let's just say that when she was done blowing all of my hair dry, the comb was a comb no more. It was embarrassing!  My cousin looked at me and said, "so I know I said a relaxer isn't good for you, BUT um, maybe you should get one again." No shit Sherlock.

          That was over eleven years ago, and I still have a relaxer

While I was sick, the time came for me to get a touch up, but again, I was sick, so I went two extra weeks without a relaxer touching my hair...it was pure HELL! I was all but breaking combs. Ya'll, I don't have the kind of natural hair where I can do a braidout, or the kind of hair that's good for wash and go. No, to get MY hair to act right, I have to press it, and THEN take a flat iron to it, and God forbid any kind of moisture touches it. Well, then you can just forget about it. NO MA'AM

I'm not that girl who says natural hair is bullshit, I don't knock those who choose to be natural. I think it's cute on some, and others, need to find another option because natural ain't for everybody. I wish I didn't get bored so easily, I would have sisterlocks. But I can't, because then I'd be stuck with it, and I like to change it up from time to time. My point is this, I will never (and I do mean never) go an extra two weeks without a relaxer. Judge me if you want to, but until you start buying my combs, or spend an extra hour on this head, you can keep your opinions.

*flips hair*