The Giving Tree...Is That Me?

3:44 PM

I've always loved the book The Giving Tree. As a kid, I remember sitting on the floor listening to my second grade teacher Mrs. Ganar read that book to the class and then explain exactly what the story was about. As a kid, you take everything in and try to apply it to life, but at that young age, it's almost impossible to apply a story of selfishness and selflessness to a life that's just beginning. I didn't get it then, but I surely get it now.

I know a person who sort of pops up in my life when she's going through something, she doesn't contact me otherwise. I mean, I rarely get a hello (just because) from her. Yet, she's all hey I need your help, when it's convenient for her. I'm not really sure, if I've ignored it all this time, or if there is something in me that wants to help everybody. I don't like to see people struggle in life. If I can help, I usually do, and if I don't, there is this feeling of guilt that settles in my spirit. That's a really hard thing to deal with. But so is being someone's therapist when there is no incentive. I wouldn't even call this person a friend, she's just somebody I know that has issues. 

People who give an abundance of advice can’t be angry when others continuously come to them for help. But, they can get angry when people take advantage of the luxury that is provided to them. It’s ok to want someone to be there for you, but try being there for them also. Give a little to the person who gives a lot.

The tree gave the boy everything he had until he had nothing left to give but a place for him to sit. I’m not a tree, you can not sit on me, and use everything I have to benefit yourself. You may not build your house with my branches, or use me to build a boat.  There is difference between helping someone and trying to save them. I find myself trying to save people when they refuse to save themselves. I can’t do that anymore. I never want to be anybody’s everything.

This isn't about making someone feel bad about leaning on me. This is me saying that at 25 years old, I'm finally coming into my own, making life decisions that will alter the person that I am now into who I am supposed to be. I need to know that the people in my life are going to be there when I need them. So while I'm making these changes, I can't carry someone else's problems and my problems, it's just too heavy.

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