Friendship...I'm Doing It Wrong

4:13 AM

The women in my family are extremely close. We disagree, argue, and stop talking to each other completely, yet, we always find a way to fix whatever is wrong and keep it moving. I love that about us. I was talking to my cousin not to long ago and we were talking about friendship, and honestly friendship isn't a big thing to her. It's sort of just there, it's just a word, there is no real emotion there. I understand that. I told her, I believe that she's that way because she and I have always been close. We had our first argument at nineteen, and our second at around twenty three or twenty four but even with all of that foolishness, she is the one constant in my life. With her I know that when everybody else who calls themselves my friends is gone or...whatever, she will always be there. I never have to worry about her not being there. She accepts everything about me, there is no filter when we talk. We completely disagree on certain topic and agree to disagree and I love that about our relationship. She is the blueprint for what I look for in a friend.

Someone once said that, if you find that you can't have a stable friendship with another female, that you're doing it wrong. And I have to say that I agree. I was once one of those girls who use to say, me and females do NOT get along. And I believed that. But then I started thinking, it's not that I couldn't get along with females, I was just picking the wrong females to  be friends with. I have standards that I've set for every man that I've dated, they aren't ridiculous standards, but they were set for a reason. However, I recently realized that I never set standards for the people that I call friend. I was doing it wrong.

So recently, I began eliminating people from my life, I cut off contact with those who weren't living up to the standards that I set for my friendships. In order for me to build healthy friendships that I could rely on it was necessary. I've had many disappointments where friends are concerned because I was doing it wrong, I figure since I'm older, it's time I start doing it right.

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