Simple shit triggers the things that make me panic.
Every year three of my friends take me out to dinner for my birthday, and I'm always really excited about these get togethers because they are so special. However, this year whenever one of them mentioned the dinner for my day I backed out and made up an excuse as to why we wouldn't be doing it this year. I even went so far as to make sure that we have dinner the weekend before my birthday just so that we don't have to celebrate it. Last year I had no intentions of working on my birthday but now, I just might. I don't want to think about this day, and what it means, and what I have done, or what I haven't done. I don't want to think about the number 25 at all. I want this day to come and go. No birthday wishes, no how old are you, no singing, no you're getting old...just silence. That's all.
People always ask me what I want for my birthday and I usually say that I don't know, because I don't. I shop for myself so often that when the holidays come around I have no use for anything. The answer I don't know never sits well with people, so this year I'm asking for only one thing.
Honesty
I believe that that is the best gift that anyone could give me this year. No lies, no smoke mirrors, just honesty.
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